26.4.10

Life of a Starving Artist in Haiku

I was trying to come up with something to read at my open mic night this week. I've been really busy, and I haven't had time to write anything really long, so I tried my hand at haiku. I wanted to write things about my life that frustrated me. I wanted to get like three or four of them, but I had so much fun that I did fifteen. I really want to share them with you all. I categorized them for easy reference:)

JOB

Hello sir. Can I
Get you a glass of wine to
Wash down that smug look?

Thanks for applying
We want you to have this job
Oh. You're an artist

I have a B.S.
It's really a B.A., but
It's in film, so... yeah.

Account overdrawn
I want to change perspective
Paycheck underdrawn.

I am a waiter
Until something better comes
my job is to wait.

GIRLS

You must wait until
My heart stops beating so fast
Then I will call you.

ROOMMATES

I will wash dishes
When hell freezes or I write
My English paper

Arhythmic snoring
If you take requests could you
Sing soft in your sleep?

Your girlfriend giggles
When you tickle her elbows
I'll cut off your hands.

Heavy metal songs
Fill my ears in the mornings
I need a Q tip.

I wish I could say
"Go to bed, it's 3 AM"
In Vietnamese.

I like loud music
until I'm tired and have to
work in the morning.

I know how to sleep
With the lights on and a big
pillow on my face.

MISC.

Bumbling hornet.
How are you inside my car?
Did you bring a friend?

Is it chocolate chips?
I found in my silverware?
Never mind, rat shit.

Haha. Sorry about that. It made me giggle.

No comments: