Fat

I have two umbrellas.

I have one because I bought it when it was raining, and I needed it. The other one I bought because I forgot where I put the first one, and it was raining again. I found the first one again right after I bought the second one.

Nothing ever really goes away. Especially once you decide you don't need it(them?) anymore.

What else is new because I don't remember the first time?

I ate chicken with 예슬 after work. She said that she wanted to eat chicken yesterday, but there was no one to eat it with. I ate chicken yesterday. Alone isn't my problem right now.

Is it bad luck or poor choices that make us dissatisfied? I could make a case for either. I'm not sure which I hope it could be. Were everything the result of my choices, I could change anything I wanted, couldn't I? On the other hand, if everything were left to fate, then I could relax for once. The loss of freedom comes with a certain amount of peace. It's called acceptance. Since everything is unknown, I find myself both alert and unchanged.

Maybe I knew the answer once and I just forgot. I know about forgetfullness. I have two umbrellas.

Spicy food gives me the hiccups. She only knows one remedy. I can think of at least 8. I'm kind of jealous of her.

I learned about these Korean birds that everyone hates. They were once a symbol of prosperity.

"In the old days, they were very, um...uncommon thing, but these days, they are everywhere, and they are fat."

"Are they still a symbol of prosperity?"

"Not anymore. Why?"

I guess we always assumed that success was a good thing. Here another season has changed, and it's spring. Once, I needed a jacket, and now it's an umbrella.

I also have two jackets.

I learned the Korean word for squirrel, but I forgot it. I have to draw diagrams sometimes just to prove that I know what she's talking about.

"Where did you learn to draw like that? Academy?"

"No, I just look at things for a long time."

I've been looking, but it still seems like I don't know which way I'm going. It's late and it's starting to rain again.

예슬 forgot her umbrella.

"That's okay," I tell her. "I have two."